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HaZyFaErY's Journal


HaZyFaErY's Journal

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14 entries this month
 

PRIVATE ENTRY

22:27 Jan 27 2009
Times Read: 658


• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •


 

upset

13:37 Jan 25 2009
Times Read: 663


i am so upset. you won;t let me in, you say its nothing but it is something or you wouldn't act this way. you ignore, and when i try to make a connection you blow me off without a second thought. i have tried to be there for you but i can't if you won't let me. don't push me away. i am here for you any time night or day.

and when you take the intimacy away its unbearable. you know i am a nympho, yet you still take it, selfishly. like its no big deal. like my feelings don't make two shits . i am upset and there is nothing i can do to make it better. please don't ignore me. i have feelings just like you. probably more than you...

life here is NOT that bad. yet you pout and whine and act like the biggest baby i have ever seen. you are selfish. and inconsiderate.


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friends

12:49 Jan 21 2009
Times Read: 671


i have made so many new friends here. i am so happy. everyone has been nice, and helpful. full of information and full of great compliments. i absolutely love all of you. all of my coven for sure, and drayth, raven, memnoch123, laurell, toxicwarrior, grayhater, many more. if i have left u out i apologize... hugs and bites to you all


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Fuck it

16:13 Jan 20 2009
Times Read: 672


nothing i say or do is right. what i wear, where i go- nothing is right. always fighting and yelling. always cussing and torture. fuck it. fuck the people. fuck their ideas and mean words, fuck them all. you aren't happy here, get out!!!

you say you care but you yell and say hurtful things. fuck u- get out. you don't care. you don't matter any more. brat, succubus, leave me alone. i fucking hate you. i gave you life and you take it for granted. you yell and scream and lie and cheat. i hate you. fuck you...


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emotions

16:03 Jan 17 2009
Times Read: 676


i have a mix of emotions today. i need energy and most of all i need sex.... licking and fucking. i am so riled up today and i can't control my urges.. my thoughts myneeds


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cold

16:39 Jan 16 2009
Times Read: 678


today it is 6 degrees. not the best weather to hunt for fresh blood in. blast the sun blast the cold,

i need warm blood and a warm bath to share with someone.


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blah

00:45 Jan 16 2009
Times Read: 679


today i feel blah... you ever have one of those days?whenever nothing goes right and everything you do/say is wrong? well, that's me. the weather matches the people. it is colder every day lately. makes me wanna stay in bed all day. which tomorrow i can. smiles.. and be alone... til the kids get up...damn!


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energy

22:08 Jan 12 2009
Times Read: 687


today i feel weakened. like my life's blood has been drained. i feel drained, almost close to being out. i need energy. bring me the greatest, brightest person you know. so i may draw off their energy for my own. and take back my life!


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haircut

19:43 Jan 10 2009
Times Read: 691


today me and shel went shopping. and i got my hair cut.its ok. but since my hair is naturally curly. it looks different. not bad different but i am not sure if i like it. oh well, this usually happens. i never like anything that is done to my hair. maybe its me, maybe its my hair. maybe both. i hope i get used to it.


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the need to fulfill

18:17 Jan 08 2009
Times Read: 697


why do we love? why can't we just fuck and let go? why do we feel this need for something that hurts us more times over than it seems to be worth? so many questions..... no answers. on my quest to quench my thirst, i have learned that the most likely people i drain is family. a touch here, a nibble there. always to feed that need. a need so great that i cannot control. making me behave and do things that i never thought was possible. just for attention, a look, a nod, a touch. always feeling that i need to take more and more.

i often find myself thinking that if i hurt myself maybe they will come to me and give me what i need. so , maybe, i don't have to take it. it is a constant battle. that i may never win.


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Elvira

01:08 Jan 08 2009
Times Read: 704


I can't believe i found this!!! She is my absolute favorite from the seventiesand eighties!!!!!! i love you elvira!!!!!!!



TwistedSiblings.com - Twisted MySpace layouts & stickers!

TwistedSiblings.com - Twisted MySpace layouts & stickers!TwistedSiblings.com - Twisted MySpace layouts & stickers!

TwistedSiblings.com - Twisted MySpace layouts & stickers!


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disappointment

13:56 Jan 04 2009
Times Read: 712


don't ever tell anyone your secret. they laugh and taunt saying they are joking. but they are not. they secretly talk about you behind your back and laugh. a lot. it hurts, you hate. they judge. always they judge. and disappoint. noone understands. its like an empty dream. you seem happy and then you see them. what a joke. Do not judge me, lest you be judged.


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discovery

21:51 Jan 03 2009
Times Read: 713


thanks to nocturnal, i have discovered who i truly am. i am a psi vampire. i am ecstatic to discover this. everything that has happened over the last 30 years has been explained just by going to the right person. i thank her dearly for this information. my life is clearer now than ever before. i have awakened to a new me. to a new concept of me. i can say goodbye to being sad because i found where i fit in. where i belong. ... i hope she takes me in. i hope she directs me in the right direction. i knew my fascination was not crazy. you are the only one i can tell. i have found home.



Photobucket



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LOST

17:34 Jan 02 2009
Times Read: 715


Today i was on a journey. Not a long journey. but it turned out to be one. I got lost in the middle of a big city. I was scared and upset... Two feelings i don't like to have together, two feelings that i hate with a passion. i felt helpless and alone.Even though I had my little one with me. the only good thing was i wasn't walking. it was rainy, cold and foggy. if i wasn't lost, it might have been fun.



darkness Pictures, Images and Photos



if i had been with a loved one or even a liked one, it would have been better.well an adult loved one.


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